(POV Kaito)
I left the office on time and stopped by the convenience store on my way home to buy some sweets. It wasn’t because I was trying to bribe anyone with gifts. I just wanted to make someone happy.
As I drove my car home, I wondered what it meant to truly face someone with sincerity and honesty. The only thing that came to mind was having a conversation, but that didn’t mean we had to talk endlessly.
I thought it would be nice to have dinner with the four sisters and get to know each other better, but… sometimes things just don’t click when I’m around.
Despite these thoughts, I realized that having conversations and dialogues with each other was the best I could do at the moment to truly and sincerely get to know each other. It might not be much, but it was the least I could do.
However, I couldn’t help feeling nervous. Facing someone and having a serious conversation can be awkward and uncomfortable, and it’s not just because I lack social skills. I think anyone would feel the same way.
I’m not good with passionate speeches or creating a good atmosphere for a conversation. Sometimes, I become embarrassed halfway through and forget what I was saying or get confused about how far we’ve come in the conversation. On the other hand, being too casual in my speech feels off-putting as well.
While I was contemplating how to approach the conversation, I had already arrived at my house.
◆◆
(POV Chinatsu)
As I sat in my second-floor bedroom with Haru, diligently working on my homework, I found myself snacking and procrastinating more than I should have. Before I realized it, the clock had struck past five, and I was nowhere near completing my assignments. Meanwhile, Chiaki, who was supposed to be in the dumb class of people, had already finished her homework.
“Chinatsu, you’re doing it wrong,”
“Oh, right… umm…”
Haru, our eldest sister, had finished her own homework in a matter of seconds, but instead of leaving us to our own devices, she was helping Chiaki and even assisting me with my homework. I had always thought that she was too overprotective.
I sometimes felt that she focused too much on others and neglected herself. But I knew that she would be happy if we relied on her and asked for her help, and that she would be unhappy if we didn’t.
So, I ended up relying on her this time as well.
“I think it’s like this…right?”
“Correct! Well done!”
I erased the incorrect answer on my printed homework and wrote a new one. Haru patted my head in approval, and I couldn’t help but smile at her baby-like cooing. But although It was comforting, I felt quite conflicted being treated like a baby.
As Haru continued to stroke my hair, she asked,
“Onii san…what do you think about him?”
As always, she seemed to know what was going on, even if I didn’t say anything. She knew that I was the only one who couldn’t trust that guy. And that fact made me feel uneasy.
“Can’t trust him?”
“….Yeah.”
“…I haven’t completely trusted him either. I don’t think Chiaki or Chifuyu have either…you’re not alone. So don’t worry.”
“Thank you.”
Haru’s words slipped easily into my heart, bringing a sense of relief that I didn’t have to rush. But at the same time, I wondered if she was just being considerate because she’s kind. Perhaps, I was afraid that one day I would be the only one unable to trust him.
“It’s okay…”
“Yeah…”
Haru could read my slight change in mood, and her warm touch was comforting. Once I had calmed down, she removed her hand.
And then, as we resumed our homework…
“Oh, Kaito! I’m hungry!” Chiaki’s cheerful voice echoed through the house, and when I heard it I knew right away he had returned.
“It seems like Onii-san is back…should we go say welcome back since we’re indebted to him?” Haru asked.
“….I know,”
We made sure to say “welcome back” every day, as we all knew that we were indebted to him. However, I still had a strong desire to keep my distance from him, despite understanding that my behavior was impolite. So after saying our greetings, I will quickly return to the second-floor bedroom.
Haru led me down the stairs by the hand. As we opened the living room door, there stood a figure much larger than myself. Memories of that day flooded back, and I instinctively hid behind Haru.
“Welcome home, Onii-san.”
“W-Welcome…home.”
“I appreciate the warm welcome, but you don’t have to come all the way down here for me.”
“No, it’s fine…”
“Well then, I’ll be going now…”
I fled the scene as fast as I could. I wanted to escape the fear and the feeling of being excluded from the group.
I rushed up the stairs, and as I took the final step, a deep voice called out from behind me.
“Hey, wait up, Chinatsu.”
“Ah…!”
I involuntarily shuddered as I realized that he was there. What should I do? I didn’t want to have a conversation with someone who was much bigger than me. I knew I wouldn’t be able to speak well and would just end up making a mess, which would only make the other person uncomfortable.
However, if I ignored or ran away from the situation, it would only make things worse. So, I slowly turned around to face him.
He stood there, right at the foot of the stairs, wearing a somewhat awkward smile on his face.
“W-What is it?”
“Um, well… first of all, I’m harmless, so please don’t worry!” he said, still smiling nervously.
“H-Huh?”
He raised both hands and continued to speak, assuring me that he was not an enemy.
“Well, you see… this is a bit difficult to say, but between me and Chinatsu… oh, wait, is it okay to call you Chinatsu without an honorifics? We’re not that close yet, maybe it’s better to use your last name?”
“No, It’s fine to call me by my name…”
“I see.”
What consideration… Why is he being so kind, even though this is his own home? I don’t really understand why.
“Anyway, Chinatsu…”
“Yes?”
“Me and Chinatsu are… well, it’s hard to say but…we don’t get along very well…”
“Huh? Uh, that’s…”
It still felt uncomfortable. What should I do? I had probably upset the landlord… Just as I was feeling uneasy, he suddenly raised his hand again, as if to show that he understood how I felt.
“Oh, no, no. I’m not angry or anything. It’s just that, well… I want us to be friends.”
“F-Friends?”
“Yes, in a general sense. I don’t mean anything weird or anything like that. You can relax.”
“I-I see…”
I couldn’t quite understand what he meant by wanting to be friends in a weird way. However, he continued to speak with an awkward smile on his face.
“We’re living in the same house, after all. It’s not good for either of us if we keep feeling uncomfortable around each other. That’s why I’m saying this, and I don’t mean anything weird by it.”
“I understand…”
The emphasis on “not in a weird way” was strong. I didn’t understand what he meant by that, but perhaps it was something weird and he was denying it so much in order to hide it…?
“Well, anyway. I really think it’s difficult for strangers to become friends. So, let’s have a conversation right here, right now.”
“H-here?”
“Yeah, right here.”
The top and bottom of the stairs in the hallway. With this distance between us, it did feel more reassuring than talking up close as usual… or not.
But is it really a good idea to have a conversation out of nowhere like this…uuu, I’m starting to get nervous. How long is this going to go on for? Honestly, I don’t want it to be too long…
“Relax. When I say conversation, it’s only for a minute. There’s no point in making it longer and making it awkward,”
A-a minute, huh…. But thinking about it, this guy seems to have been reading my mind a bit too much since a while ago. No, maybe my emotions get easily shown on my face.
“Anyway, sorry for jumping right into it, but how’s school been for you lately?” he asked.
“It’s… it’s been okay,”
“I see,”
“Uh, yeah,”
“”…””
An awkward silence fell between us as the flow of conversation came to a halt.
“Um, what’s your favorite food?” he finally asked.
“T-tomatoes,”
“O-okay, then tomorrow’s dinner will be….” he trailed.
I wonder if he’ll make me a tomato dish. I would be very happy if so.
“Roast beef.”
“…”
“Ah, I’m sorry. You seemed nervous, so I tried to say something funny to make you feel better, but… just forget about it.”
“Yes I will”
He, who was below me, continued talking with a difficult expression on his face.
“Do you have any problems or worries, Chinatsu…? If you do, you can tell me about them…”
“No, I’m okay,”
“I see… Well, if you ever feel like talking about it, I’m here to listen… A minute has already passed…Let’s talk for another minute tomorrow, okay?”
“Huh?”
“Let’s talk like this for just a minute every day, including the day after tomorrow and the day after that. Let’s get to know each other gradually without pushing ourselves too hard. How about it?”
“Y-yes,”
“I see… I guess you can’t say no when I ask you like that. But if you ever feel uncomfortable or hesitant, don’t force yourself. It’s not like I want to do this more than you do… Anyway, I think that’s enough for today,”
He looked troubled, perhaps because of me. I still couldn’t trust him and kept my distance, so it wasn’t surprising that he looked uneasy trying to bridge the gap between us.
“I’m sorry…”
“Hmm?” he looked up.
“I just can’t seem to trust you like my sisters do. I’m sorry if I’m making things difficult for you…”
“No, I don’t think that’s something to apologize for, is it? I think it’s absolutely normal for people to have individual differences in that kind of thing….Yeah, I don’t think you need to worry about that….”
He seemed a bit fidgety now, as if he had said something embarrassing. His eyes were slightly averted.
“I’ve spent years with some people, but unfortunately, there are many who only give me a polite smile and pretend to like me without having any genuine trust or credibility. It’s disheartening to realize that there are more of them than those I can truly trust…So, you don’t have to worry about that because there’s no need to force yourself to trust anyone. Instead, let’s start afresh and move forward from now on.”
“….Okay.”
“By the way, let’s have spaghetti Napolitan and tomato juice for dinner tomorrow. See you later.”
After saying that, he turned and headed back to the living room.
I couldn’t see his back anymore, so I went back to my usual room and turned on the lights. I sat down in the corner of the room and felt an unusual exhaustion. It was an experience that I rarely had and one that I had recently rejected.
Even at school, I hardly talked to anyone other than Chifuyu.
We only spent a little over a minute together, but that memory will be engraved in my mind forever.
As I was reminiscing about our conversation, the door opened, and Haru came in. She looked worried as she sat down next to me.
“So, how did it go?” she asked.
“…”
How did it go, she says. I wonder if she heard our conversation. Maybe she was secretly listening. No, she was definitely listening.
“Did you hear us?”
“Yeah, I was just listening,” she replied.
“I see,”
“So How was it?”
Not only was I not good at expressing myself with words, but I genuinely didn’t know how to feel.
“don’t know……”
“Did you enjoy the conversation?” she asked.
“don’t know……”
“Do you think you can trust him?” she asked.
“……don’t know”
“Were Onii-san’s jokes funny?” she asked.
“They weren’t funny,”
“I agree. They weren’t funny at all,” she said.
“Yeah, that’s one thing I can answer clearly.”
I didn’t know whether to trust him or not. But one thing was clear, his joke wasn’t funny at all.
And just like me, Haru felt the same way about the joke, which made me feel relieved that we had something in common. It was nice to feel connected. I realized that I had found a bond with my sister.
“The joke was terrible and not even remotely funny, but I felt like Onii-san said some good things,”
“I thought so too… at least a little bit,”
“And it was kind of funny how he was embarrassed about saying something nice,” Haru added.
“Oh, so he was really embarrassed at that time.”
“I think that’s probably the case,”
“Yeah… And he also said something about wanting to talk for one minute every day…”
“I think that maybe it’s not about trying too hard to get closer quickly, but rather taking things slowly over time.”
“I see…”
Should I just take my time…
“If I may borrow Onii-san’s words, as human beings, it’s only natural to have individual differences, so it’s better not to worry too much about it. Onii-san has lived longer than us and knows many things, so even if we don’t know if it’s right or wrong, I think it could be one of the answers….”
“As always, you seem to know what’s on my mind. Also, your face is a little red…”
“I’m a little embarrassed saying that too…”
I noticed that Haru, who usually kept a stoic expression, blushed slightly. Her toes, tucked neatly together as she sat, fidgeted ever so slightly, indicating a subtle release of her restlessness.
“Well, I was thinking about it when I overheard Onii-san and Chinatsu talking, but isn’t it a bit early to worry about whether you can trust him or not? I think Chinatsu’s current troubles can wait until the future. After all, it’s only been half a year since you came to this house and met Onii-san. Let’s wait a couple of years before worrying about it.”
“Isn’t that too far away?”
“Do you think so? I think it’s better to have more time, considering individual differences.”
“….Is that so?”
“That’s right!”
“…”
“That’s right!”
“Oh, you’re really pushing it…”
Indeed, that might be the case. It would be pointless to keep worrying like an idiot forever. For now, I understand that there are still many things that I don’t know. I decided to go along with my sister’s words.
Suddenly, while talking with Haru, I found myself wondering:
Q: Will the day eventually come when I can trust him?
A: I don’t know.”
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