– Murmur, murmur.
The murmuring of the crowd could be heard from all directions.
To them, it was probably just a juicy bit of gossip, but I wondered if they had any idea that to me, it felt no different than sharp blades piercing my skin.
“Why is the princess with a guy like that…?”
“Maybe he’s got some kind of dirt on her?”
Strictly speaking, I was the one with the dirt on me…
Thump—
The sensation of a large mass of flesh pressing against my left arm slowly brought my dazed mind back to focus.
“Mars. If you’re my lover, walk with your back straighter and with more confidence.”
She was pressing her chest against me and saying sweet lines, but…
Her face which no one else could see was distorted as if she was in great pain.
I was the one who wanted to cry, so why did she look like she was the one suffering more?
“If you hate this so much, you don’t have to do it, you know? If you’re going to make that face, don’t even try in the first place!”
“Is there any clearer proof than this? Quit your whining and keep acting!”
I could feel all sorts of malice targeting me from every direction.
The rage of the women. The jealousy of the men.
Ah… Why had I ever stepped up to help her in the first place?
***
“You shall become my fake lover!”
“Have you gone mad?”
Ah, crap. Even I couldn’t hold back at that point.
The princess, with her eyes wide with shock at my blunt words, seemed to realize just how absurd her suggestion had been and tried to brush it off casually.
“Is it really such a bad offer for you? Even if it’s fake, you’d still get to be the lover of a beauty like me, wouldn’t you?”
“Just the fact that you’re even thinking something like that is already the problem.”
“…Aren’t you being quite rude to a princess of the Empire?”
“Take it as honest advice and bear with it.”
My tone might’ve been rough, but it was actually a wise counsel full of loyalty.
A nobody like me becoming the lover of a princess would damage her reputation, and displaying such excessive self-confidence would go against the humility required of a ruler. So really, I was just speaking the truth.
When the person you serve says something crazy, it’s your duty to call them out sharply.
It hurts, but that’s the role of a loyal subject.
“A loyal subject shouldn’t call their liege mad or say things like that kind of nonsense.”
“It’s not an insult; it’s a plain and honest fact, so there’s nothing wrong with it.”
“Didn’t you say earlier that you would help me?! Are you saying a man can so easily go back on his word?”
“No, what I meant was that I’d support you behind the scenes with everything I have. Not that I’d help you by becoming your lover.”
What kind of vassal goes up to their ruler and says, “I’ll help you, so please become my lover”?
Clearly, such a person would bring ill fortune to the nation and should be beheaded immediately.
“Just take this chance and ask Pollo instead, would you? I’ll even help convince him. That way, you’ll break free from His Majesty’s interference and get the man you wanted. A win-win situation, isn’t it?”
“I told you already. Making him my lover carries too many risks.”
“Becoming your lover puts me at risk, Your Highness.”
Would the guards surrounding the princess just sit back and watch?
I’d be lucky not to get knocked out from behind while walking at night.
“The people around me are always hoping I’ll meet a good man. If I announce I’ve found a lover, won’t they be happy for me?”
That really depends on the lover, Your Highness.
If it were someone like Pollo as a boyfriend, people would say things like, “I’m jealous~ You two look great together~”.
But if it were someone like me, the reactions would turn extreme: “That’s scary~ Break up with him~”.
“So then, how exactly are you planning to take responsibility for my future marriage? I need to at least see the face of a fox-like wife and some rabbit-like kids before I go.”
“Well, if it comes to that, we could just get married for real. And if I take Pollo Helios as a concubine, wouldn’t that solve everything? Of course, I won’t interfere if you decide to bring in other women either.”
“……”
“……That was a joke, so please don’t look at me like that. I swear I can feel my dignity being chipped away…”
Right. It had to be a joke.
No decent human being should say something like that so casually.
“I have a plan of my own, so all you need to do is faithfully play the role of my lover for the time being. If His Majesty cancels the marriage, I’ll make sure you’re compensated financially, and I’ll take care of it so no nasty rumors spread about our breakup. I’ll just say I forced you into this ruse by threatening you over the situation in your territory, all to better understand the heart of a man.”
“Then… what about Pollo?”
If she went through with this the way she said, she’d end up being the only villain. Then what was she planning to do about her relationship with Pollo?
“Hmm… From what I’ve heard, when men see a female friend they’re close to spending time with another guy, they tend to feel something like jealousy…. even if they don’t realize it. So, maybe this is a good chance to show me getting along sweetly with you and stir up a little jealousy in the young master Helios. Not a bad idea, right?”
Did that… make sense?
But thinking back, I’d never once seen Pollo show any sign of jealousy toward me.
Even when I achieved more than him and earned recognition from Count Helios himself, Pollo who was his own son had congratulated me wholeheartedly, saying he was proud to call me his friend. He was such a kind guy, almost to the point of being a fool.
Even now, three beautiful girls from the club were practically throwing themselves at Pollo, yet he hadn’t spared them so much as a glance. Would things change a little if he saw the princess and me acting like we were in a romantic relationship?
“With the material you gave me, it seemed that young master Helios had never experienced any kind of emotional shock. So this is the plan to awaken feelings he didn’t even know he had by making it look like he lost a close female friend to his best friend!”
“I… is that so?”
“His Majesty will never approve of a romantic relationship between you and me. So, using our ‘breakup’ as an excuse, I’ll cancel the engagement to Prince Cretia, and then we’ll just go back to our normal lives.”
“Hmm…”
“If the plan works, I’ll set you up on blind dates with the female members of the student council.”
“What the hell, let’s give it a shot.”
And just like that, our fake relationship play began.
Without the faintest idea how this little performance would end.
***
News of the princess and I being in a relationship quickly spread throughout the academy.
Honestly, if someone suddenly saw the usually charismatic princess clinging to someone and acting flirtatious, even nonexistent rumors would start flying.
Thanks to that, I became public enemy number one among all the students and had quite the spectacular day.
Barely managing to finish my daily schedule, I skipped training and headed straight for the safety of my dorm room, intending not to come out…. only to have the noble lady block my way.
“You, y-you… is it true?!”
“Is what true…?”
“That you’re dating the princess!”
Why was she here, giving me a hard time too?
It wasn’t like I hadn’t already had enough. I received seven threatening letters, five duel challenges, and eighteen angry confrontations all in just one day. I was absolutely exhausted.
“Well, that’s…”
Wait a second. Would it be okay to tell her the truth?
She was a rival who shared the same goal as me, and I had saved her life, so I figured there was a chance she might help lessen my suffering if I told her the truth.
Thinking that things might get a little easier if I had even one person on my side, I decided to secretly tell her the truth and ask her to keep it absolutely confidential.
“I-Is it really true?”
“Of course not. What would the princess possibly see in me to take me as her lover? I don’t have the status or the ability to be the princess’s partner.”
“Well… that’s true.”
“…….”
“Ugh, seriously, what’s that woman even thinking? She should just stick to what she was doing. Now everything’s gotten annoying.”
She still looked irritated, but the fact that her frustration was now aimed at the princess instead of me was a welcome change.
“So, I have a favor to ask.”
“What is it?”
“Could you maybe help me out a bit? I was somewhat prepared when I took on this role, but… it’s a little tougher than I expected.”
Though I had fallen for the bait and agreed to this, dealing with the pure malice of people all on my own was far more exhausting than I had imagined.
If our noble lady could just mediate a little with those scheming behind the scenes, my life at the academy would become much more bearable.
“Help out, huh… Hmm~ Fine, I’ll give you a hand. I do owe you one, after all.”
“Ohh! Thank you so much!”
I expressed my endless gratitude for the noble lady’s mercy and waited for tomorrow with a heart full of excitement.
….
….
“What is the meaning of this? Are you trying to challenge the authority of the princess?”
“Oh my~ I don’t know what you’re talking about~ Isn’t any play more entertaining when it has a cast full of talented actors?”
“Seems the trauma from your kidnapping was more severe than I thought. Judging by how mistaken you are about who you’re dealing with.”
“Maybe it’s because I’ve tasted real fear, but half-hearted intimidation doesn’t feel all that threatening anymore~ Is that a cat I hear meowing~?”
…Wait, weren’t you supposed to be helping me?
Leave a Reply