Right after the conversation with the Emperor, Yujin took some time to briefly explain the treatment he was carrying out to the Emperor.
Since the Emperor was, after all, Elicia’s guardian, Yujin thought he should at least know the details of what was being done.
And after listening to him, the Emperor could not hide the complicated look on his face.
[I had already heard about it to some extent… but now that I’m actually hearing the words that turning my daughter into a demon is the only way, I cannot help but feel incredibly conflicted.]
“Spilled water cannot be gathered back into the cup, and a being that has broken out of its egg can never return to it. And Her Highness, the Princess, has already halfway broken out of her shell.”
[….…]
Upon hearing those words, the Emperor’s expression sank a little. He murmured with a sigh.
[A being that has broken out of its egg can never return to it… Yes, I suppose you’re right. It seems everything is already too late.]
“……”
[My daughter… Elicia is a pitiful child.]
The Emperor let out a bitter lament in front of Yujin.
[Simply because she was born into the Imperial Family, she experienced tragedy at an age when she knew nothing of the world. And from that moment on, she closed off her heart and relentlessly drove herself forward… only to end up on the verge of being devoured by a demon… What a wretched life she’s lived.]
Strictly speaking, the sight of the Emperor speaking like this was not a sight that a ruler should show before an outsider like Yujin. Even if Yujin knew everything about the Imperial Family’s situation and stood in a position to help the Emperor, that didn’t change the fact.
As someone who should not easily expose his vulnerabilities as the ruler of a nation, the weakness the Emperor was showing now… Yet, in the figure of a man who seemed to have aged several decades in an instant, Yujin simply watched in silence.
And facing Yujin who quietly watched him, the Emperor soon let out a bitter smile and waved his hand.
[That was discourteous of me. I’ve shown an unseemly side of myself in front of an esteemed guest. Please forget what I just said.]
“I shall do so.”
Perhaps it was because even the Emperor himself lacked composure. To think he would utter such a lament in front of Yujin, whom he had only met today.
That was why Yujin showed consideration for the Emperor. And the Emperor, recognizing that, offered his gratitude without resistance.
[Thank you.]
“I will do my utmost regarding Her Highness the Princess’s matter. Of course, since the method involves awakening her as a full-fledged demon, it may not be entirely agreeable to you…”
[…Of course, I do have some reservations about that part, but I have no intention of arguing further. More than anything, after hearing the method you proposed to save my child, this thought occurred to me.]
“What thought is that?”
[Perhaps the reason we couldn’t find a way was because we were trying to find a perfect solution.]
“……”
[Because we wanted everything to proceed without a hitch, we hoped for a miracle and clung to what was essentially a hopeless wish. As an emperor, and more so as a father, I’ve been indecisive and utterly incompetent.]
The Emperor spoke those words with a hint of self-mockery. Yujin looked at him for a moment before opening his mouth.
“That’s what makes us human, isn’t it?”
[…Human, you say.]
“I hope you won’t misunderstand me. I didn’t mean that in any negative sense. The essence of Your Majesty’s choice, after all, came from a desire not to give up on anything.”
He had wished to save his daughter Elicia while also hoping that the process and the outcome would remain free of any flaws.
That could certainly be seen as greed… but Yujin, at the very least, wanted to see it this way.
“I think that heart of not being able to let go of anything is profoundly human. Whether that’s seen as negative or positive.”
[…..…]
Upon hearing those words, the Emperor let out a brief hollow laugh. He spoke.
[There probably aren’t many who could say such a thing to me, an emperor, unless they were transcendent beings. Let alone say it so boldly and directly to my face. At the very least, you are the first.]
“Is that so?”
At the word “transcendent,” Yujin gave a wry smile inwardly. He thought that his identity might be revealed.
[Other races and especially elves might be an exception. They’re a species with quite a strong sense of disdain toward humans, after all. Still, among humans, you are the first.]
“I see.”
[How many people could speak as though defining an emperor as merely a single human being?]
The Emperor gave another wry smile as he said that. Watching him, Yujin opened his mouth to speak.
“Isn’t it because one is a person before being an emperor?”
[That way of thinking feels rather refreshing to me. Of course, in truth, many may think as you do. But the fact that you can speak it aloud so confidently before me…that’s what sets you apart.]
The Emperor let out a quiet chuckle and straightened his posture. From the man who had just moments ago appeared rather easygoing, the dignified bearing of a sovereign ruler began to emerge.
[That is precisely why my curiosity about you has only grown. From what I can tell, you’re neither ignorant of worldly etiquette and norms, nor are you particularly naïve. And yet, in many ways, your words and actions defy convention.]
“……”
[Of course, I don’t intend to pry. I’m hardly in a position to do so right now. There’s just one thing I’d like to ask.]
“I’m listening.”
[Why do you help my daughter?]
“……”
[It’s a question I’ve had ever since I began to get a read on you through our conversation. Even as you assist her, there’s no sign that you expect anything in return. Yet for a mere act of goodwill, isn’t it far too great in scale? This isn’t the sort of kindness one could dismiss as simple charity.]
Yujin fell silent at those words. Why was he helping Elicia…
“It began with the simple thought of helping a struggling student. As a professor. It was more of a sense of obligation than anything else.”
[……]
“That thought hasn’t changed much, even now. But…”
[But?]
As Yujin trailed off, the Emperor countered with a question. Yujin paused for a moment at those words.
Certainly, in this world, Han-cheol who knew far more than he did had once said this.
No matter what the player did, it was impossible to change the ending where Elicia would either be devoured by the demon or die.
As if it were a predetermined fate, those words had never sat well with Yujin.
“Now… I simply wish for Her Highness the Princess to overcome her misfortune and find happiness. If I had to put it in words… I suppose it comes down to self-satisfaction.”
[…And why is that? What does that child’s happiness have to do with you, that you would find satisfaction in it?]
“Probably nothing in particular. But isn’t that just how self-satisfaction works in the first place?”
[……..]
“Of course, I understand that it’s not an easy thing to accept. To think that my reason for being involved in saving a princess of an empire amounts to something as trivial as that. But, just as Your Majesty is to me, Her Highness is a student before she is a princess and a person. I merely took on the duty of helping a student as a professor, and lent a hand to a person as another person… it’s nothing more than that.”
Looking the Emperor straight in the eye, Yujin continued.
“I did it because it was something that ought to be done because it was something I could do. Nothing more than the most natural course of action… that’s all there is to it. Does that answer your question?”
[……..]
The Emperor, who had been staring blankly at Yujin for a moment, soon closed his eyes briefly.
[…To be honest, it’s not an easy answer to accept. Once you rise to a position like this, such ‘natural courses of action’ tend to become very faint, you see.]
“I understand.”
[I don’t know… I just don’t know… Even after hearing your answer, it feels like I’m left with even more questions. And yet, it doesn’t feel like you’re lying either.]
The Emperor gave a bitter laugh. It seemed that understanding a man like Yujin would not be so easy after all.
[Still, I understand what you’re trying to say. At the very least, I can tell that you have no ulterior motives. And that, in turn, is what makes you hard to grasp.]
“Is that so?”
[Those who want something are easy to deal with. But what about those who want nothing? That too is a perfectly logical concern.]
“Hmm…”
[Which is why I must ask…. is there truly nothing you want from me? A relationship in which one side receives help unilaterally, without offering anything in return, is ultimately not good for either party.]
Relationships, by nature, are built on mutual exchange. A one-sided relationship, where only one party gives or receives, cannot last long and may even give rise to conflict.
The problem, however, was that Yujin fundamentally had little need for the Imperial Family’s help, and entering into a mutual relationship with them at this point would mean taking on a certain amount of risk for Yujin.
“Are you trying to draw me in properly?”
[…I won’t deny it.]
Previously, Yujin had told the Emperor that the risks he was taking weren’t all that great.
In reality, he had no intention of going that far. If he really wanted to, Yujin could distance himself from the situation in Elicia and still come out relatively unscathed.
And as Yujin had said, he wasn’t involved in this matter because he expected something from the Imperial Family, but rather out of a sense of duty and personal satisfaction. This, from the Emperor’s perspective, likely made the whole situation all the more unsettling.
That being the case, the Emperor might have thought it worth considering the idea of forming an actual relationship of mutual exchange with Yujin.
After pondering for a moment, Yujin spoke.
“For now, I’d like to hold off on giving an answer. It’s not that I’m unwilling to take on the risk…. it’s simply that I truly have nothing I wish for at the moment.”
[…I see.]
“In that case, may I ask one favor instead? It concerns Her Highness, the Princess.”
[And what would that be?]
At that question, Yujin paused for a moment before replying.
“…I would like Your Majesty and the rest of her family to spend more time with her.”
***
TN: This was the latest chapter updated by the author for quite a while. I will keep translating tho. When the author decides to continue.
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